Teaching Your Teenagers That It Is Alright To Just Say No

This may seem a strange thing to say but many parents do not realize how essential it is to teach teenagers that dating and sex are not the same thing. It is a sad fact that all too many teenagers simply presume that sex is a natural part of dating and a quick look at television and magazines aimed at teenagers shows why this is so. Do not just assume that your children know the difference between dating and sex and ensure that you clearly communicate this message to them. Try to teach your children the ins and outs of dating and sex from an early age and strengthen this message often. Above all, help your teens to learn that dating means getting to know the other person emotionally and not simply physically. Teenagers will frequently have a 'single track mind' and you will need to hint at other things that they can do on a date rather than just focusing their thoughts on having sex.

This may appear silly but you would be astonished at how often teenagers choose sex as an option just because they are bored and cannot come up with anything better to occupy their time. So, as peculiar as it may appear you really will need to propose things that your teens can do to have fun on a date. If you can get them to stay busy enough then they will almost certainly have to say no less frequently. Several parents teach their children how to say no to sex and come up with a lengthy string of excuses or retorts.

The is all well and good but a quip normally only works once and merely brushing off the suggestion with a quip is only putting the question off and leaving the door open for the suggestion to keep coming up again and again. The solution therefore is to teach your child to simply say no sternly and clearly and that, while they may want to give reasons, they do not have to do so and merely saying no ought to be sufficient. If you find yourself in the position where your child has already experimented with sex then you may feel that it is too late to talk to them about saying no. Nothing could be farther from the truth. A lot of teenagers think that once they have had sex once they cannot really refuse to do so a second time. The mere fact that they have experimented with sex however does not mean that this can simply be 'ticked off' their development list and you have to let them know that they they are free to say no to sex if they feel uncomfortable.

You should also discuss with them the fact that engaging in sex should always be something of significance and special and that a great deal myth surrounds the so-called importance of their initial sexual experience. While discussing the importance of building relationships that are based upon a lot more than just sex, it is also essential to combine this with teaching your children about safe sex. However much you might want to do so you cannot always prevent your teenagers from engaging in sex.

You can nevertheless provide yourself with some peace of mind by trying to see that your teenagers remain safe, even if they choose not to avail themselves of your advice to stand stand their ground and make the right choices.

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